Milestone after milestone slips away as the year moves forward.  I let a few pass unnoticed but others bring a tear, a smile, a quiet moment.

I called my son yesterday for no other reason than I needed to hear his voice.  Someone else’s son had gone missing.  I felt the stab of a mother’s fear, a pain that has since deepened on learning of the young man’s death.  I cannot truly imagine the devastation.  Such sorrow could not be assuaged.  I ache for that other mother.

But last night, I did not yet know of her loss.  I only knew that if my son had been wandering in a city far from home, I too would have driven all of those hours to search for him.  Only the sight of his face would part the gloom.  I could not bear a sunrise, however beautiful the skies, if he had been lost.  

For me the sun still shines, the sky still spans blue above the earth.  For that other mother, no voice will answer her call on the silent phone which died along with her precious child.   

Last night,  my son asked, Did you call for anything special? I did not confess.  I shared a few bits of family news.  We talked about yoga and what we each had cooked for dinner.  Eventually, we came to the stack of paperwork that awaited me.  We said our goodnights.  I opened a news site and searched for word.  Seeing nothing, I turned to chores and later fell asleep over a book.  While I slept, that mother’s nightmare became eternal.  Hell swallowed her terrified spirit.  Her skies will never clear.  

I am one of the lucky ones.  My son has thus far navigated life’s sometimes troubled waters to safety.  To the mournful mother of another beloved Missouri son, I send a prayer for comfort.

It’s the twenty-second day of the one-hundred and twenty-third month of My Year Without Complaining.  Life continues.