I won’t name names, except my own. But today challenged my resolve, I’m here to tell you.
A perfect storm of problems swirled around my brain and nearly caused an explosion. I spent four hours with a client, meticulously refining a complicated settlement document. I slogged through the various back-and-forth exchanges, culling through each paragraph to find every change, the points of agreement, the areas of ambiguity. I examined each nuanced phrase and ferreted out any clause as to which I felt the other side might be waxing coy. Through all of that effort, I devised a lengthy document of which I felt fairly proud.
I spent the next 90 minutes trying to get a digitized copy of that document to move the ten feet between my goldarn fancy scanner/copier and my computer. Had my son not tired of waiting for me to come out of my office to go to lunch, I might be still pulling out my hair. But he came inside, got on his phone’s browser, and discovered gmail had screeched to a hault. I tore out to the secretarial area and lowered a boom on my poor receptionist: “You’ll have to hand-fax using the old landline fax.”
Whereupon I learned that it had stopped working three weeks ago.
I felt my voice rising as I asked how it could be that a piece of equipment had failed THREE WEEKS AGO and yet I had not been told?
My son practically hog-tied me and dragged me to lunch. “Stop yelling at everybody,” he told me. “You’re hungry, come eat.” A cup of hot tea, a “Bread for All” combo appetizer, and an hour later, I found myself walking around my suite, apologizing to anyone who had been within earshot of my melt-down, especially my poor secretary.
I don’t know if this technically qualified as a relapse day, but it came darn close. When the storms subsided, though, at least I realized that in my frustration, hunger, and worry, I had over-stepped the bounds of good grace. And now that the stormy weather passed, and the seas are calm, I’m left wondering how often in the past I have followed just this path.
I’m taking the day as a lesson; and moving forward.
Brava!
Thanks!
Hey there cuz, I’m lovin this whole new attitude that you are going for, but could you kindly quit beating yourself up about it? Everybody gets Frustrated when technology fails, and your secy SHOULD have told you that the old fashioned fax thingy was broken. But, fear crying out loud, give yourself a break! You apologized and were more gracious about it that you give yourself credit for. Nuff said, keep calm and have a snack!
My dear Kati — I have to burst your bubble but I love you for it! I am a recovering Nazi Boss. As anyone who has worked for me will tell you (Robyn?), episodes like this have been more common than rare; and this one was short! They mostly occur around Brief Due Time, Trial Crunch Time, or I Just Fixed the Tenth Error You Made this Week Time. (Okay, that last might be understandable.) But I really don’t think flaring up at people works; and the expression on their faces hurts me as much as they must be hurt by the look on mine! You’re so sweet-natured, you probably have no clue what I mean! Yes, point out error and help people change or rectify the mistake; what I’m trying to abandon is my old method of doing that! Love you too, girl!!! And thanks for reminding me not to abuse myself, either!!!!! (Insert emoticon here!)
Great recovery!